The Basics of You

SeeingThyself_BasicJournal.pdf

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In the interest of complete transparency, your life and decision making abilities are both struggling because you have no idea what you value, prioritize, like, or even want. And I can help with that.

Since the New Year started a mere 19 days ago, I've seen countless women on social media making goals that are shockingly like the top five lifestyle influencers on TikTok. And while there is nothing inherently wrong with that, I am thrilled that you are trying to grow in any way, I also happen to know that sticking to these goals and habits probably won't work. Why? Because they have nothing to do with you.

As we have probably all heard, the influx of social media is causing a "brain rot" epidemic of epic proportions. There are an alarming number of people out there who are nothing more than the sum of their algorithm. Their habits are from this influencer (needlepoint is all the craze, but it makes their hands hurt and their eyes cross), their bedroom decor is that influencer (but they don't even like gingham), their nighttime skincare routine is that influencer (but they have oily skin, and that influencer has dry), etc. etc. They then wonder why they can't stick to a routine for longer than a week, or why they still don't like their bedroom, or why they don't have a perfect, acne free complexion. Again, because the things being implemented have nothing to do with them.

Now, this isn't news. We are all aware of this challenge. Where I come in is in the solution: I can help you see yourself, and learn how to make a life that is tailored to you.

The most important place to start is with what you value. For example, I value my marriage and my peace. But before I had intentionally thought about this, however, if you had asked me, my answer probably would have been "Erm, well, I guess I value family, my job, my friends." How totally original, that one. Not that there's anything revolutionary in my actual values, but notice, my job didn't make the list. My friends didn't make the list. Because at the end of the night, as long as my peace is intact and my marriage is cared for, I do not care.

My friends get cared for because having great relationships and spending time with them greatly increases my sense of peace. I am responsible at my job because financial stability can greatly affect my marriage AND my peace. You see how it trickles down? These become my priorities.

I categorize priorities as things that directly benefit my values. I prioritize my relationships with my friends, I prioritize maintaining my job, I prioritize spending time with my husband. I also prioritize tactility, because I know if I've spent a day making things versus consuming them, I feel better, and that brings me peace. It all comes back to my values.

If I am faced with a new decision and I'm unsure, I use them as guiding lights. For example, if at night I don't know if I want to scroll TikTok or do a wind down routine, I consider that staying up until 2am doom scrolling will make me tired and anxious with my friends and at work the next day, where as if I wind down, I'll get enough sleep and can be more present and less stressed. Obviously, option 2 aligns better with my value for peace. Therefore; I do option two. This is that "knowing your why" all the gurus are talking about.

So, start with that. It's the first two pages of the printable. Next, we discuss likes and wants, I can't wait to see you there ☼